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Put Your First – and why you need to do it now

Put Your  First – and why you need to do it now

One of the biggest things that bother me is people refusing to put themselves first, yes that right you need to put you first. I see if all the time, friends, boyfriends, families, strangers, and so many other things are constantly taking priority rather than people saying no I need to focus on myself. A lot of people consider putting themself first as someone being conceited, selfish, and self-centered. This is why so many people only allow themselves to take a day or a few minutes here and there to put themselves first. When in reality if you do not put yourself first; your not going to be able to help other people. 

There are things that you can do every single day you can do to start putting yourself first. , So what exactly are you? 

Do what YOU want. 

  • This can be as small as choosing what you want for breakfast, or what you choose to wear every day. This can also be a big decision like what you want to be when you grow up or even how you want to live your life. 
  • Everyone has one life and you deserve to live it the way you choose to, in your own light, with its own unique and personal shine. 

Hang with who YOU want to hang with. 

  • Since this is your life you have a say in who you allow into your circle and who you keep at a distance, and who you don’t even allow in the vicinity. By no means do you have to let your other friends’ friends sleep over just because they know your bestie? If you do not like them they do not have to come! 
  • Life is very much cause and effect; every action we do has an opposite and equal reaction. So if you do not like someone you don’t have to let them into your life. 

Find/Focus on YOUR passions.

  • Finding something or a string of things that you’re passionate about helps anyone find happiness in the hardest of times. Focusing on your passions will help you develop and strengthen your personal identity. It’s finding little things that build you happiness and confidence. 
  • These passions can be anything from personal to even professional. Hell, your personal passion can even be turned into a business. And if you do turn your passion into a business no matter how small I am damn proud of you.


  • For some people, we have been consistently putting other people before ourselves that we forget how to put ourselves first. In fact, in some severe cases, we don’t even know how to take care of ourselves unless we are also taking care of others. 
  • Talking to a therapist helps you focus on yourself, provides tips and tricks that show you what you can do to focus on yourself a little bit each day. 

Outlets and Limits. 

  • Putting yourself first is hard to do when you’re at a breaking point. We often distract ourselves by focusing on other people; especially when we lose control. That is why it’s important to have outlets to help us regain our control, calm us down, and let go of stress or anger. 
  • It is also important to know your limits and by putting yourself first you know your limits a lot better. You know when you are close to hitting yours and when it’s okay to test them. 

Why should you put yourself first? I’m telling you all about the reasons for what you can do to put yourself first. But why? Why should you start putting yourself first? 

  • When you put you first; your ability to see your goals and visions more clearly. It’s easier to see the steps in order to achieve them 
  • If you are not okay how can you productively and correctly help others? 
  • You only get one life to live; do not waste your life not caring for yourself. There is no better time than the present. 
  • Helps create order and balance in your life; you’re able to see things more clearly 
  • You will be able to become mentally stronger
  • You will be able to become strong and more independent 
    • This means that you will be able to tell if someone is trying to manipulate yourself 

I have a best friend that constantly reminds me “you can’t light yourself on fire to keep others warm”. I appreciate this so much because it reminds me a lot of what airlines safety protocols say “please put on your face mask before assisting others”. It’s these little everyday reminders that unless you put you first and take care of yourself you will not be able to successfully help others in the long run. Please start putting yourself first. 

I am going to be clear though; choosing to put yourself first is not you being selfish; it’s you choosing to better yourself.  You deserve to be able to work on yourself and your goals without feeling like you do not care about others. So please take this as the sign to do whatever you need to do to work on yourself because you are worth it.


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